Jack Dear

I have been busy writing some other things lately or I have been operating on auto pilot.  It's a whole sick kid / not enough sleep thing.

In my distracted state, I missed writing something important.

Most of you know that Jack's birthday was last week.  I am not sure he is so happy with aging, but I am so deeply grateful for every single year, every day he has.

A few weeks ago, I found and read all the correspondence between us from the spring and summer before we got married.  I sometimes forget being wooed.  Oh my, but was he charming.  I also forget how much he gave up for us.  Before we got married, he was doing a job he was passionate about, that mattered.  Over and over in those letters, he talked about his work. Jack gave up a lot when we married, more than I understood.


Jack is so smart, so talented, but we live in the country where theaters do not abound.  We live a life that is on a school's schedule.  I tell him that we could adjust, but he knows it would be hard and that he wouldn't see Bell much unless we homeschooled and kept his schedule.  I wish I could give him that perfect job that would allow him to have it all.

There are so many little day to day things he does for us and when the day is done, those things have made a huge difference in the peace of our household.  He begins his day with lap and cartoon time with a little blond thing.  He ends his day tucking in that same little blond thing.  And the rest of the day?  Making sure our household runs smoothly and that his girls know they are loved.

I know that 47 seems like such a serious age, yet when I look at him, I see a man who has retained his charm and grace, but has exchanged some of his cynicism for the gentleness and patience of a husband and father.  I see a man who is every bit as handsome as the one I knew at 32, just a tad bit mellowed.  I am so very glad that this man exists, that this life exists, and I will honestly try to make cake more often, not just for birthdays.