Bless Me. Bless you.

Our church often stays on the same subject for several weeks at a time.  For several Sundays this summer, Reggie preached about doing good, not just believing.  I have really been thinking about that.  What fruit am I bearing?  Is it evident to others?  Is my life a blessing to those around me, or I am merely there, or even worse, do I become a stumbling block for someone?

The whole AP conference last week and the week leading up to it was such a mixed bag of frustration and blessing.  The week before AP, we discovered that Katrina ( my fellow English teacher and supposed roommate) had no room.  This greatly upset me because that meant I was rooming with a stranger.  I may come across to my kids as confident and in control, but really having a conversation with someone  I don't know terrifies me.  The first day at Elgin, I almost threw up in the bathroom - not over the job, but over having to walk into a teachers' meeting without knowing anyone.  I couldn't imagine having to sleep in the same room as a stranger.  Anyway, we got the room sorted out.  Sort of.  And then Hyatt accidentally canceled my room and I had none at all.  Driving in the city also terrifies me.  There is no way I could have stayed somewhere else and driven myself to UT everyday.  Once again, it got straightened out.  These were things I really prayed about.  I prayed that God either put me in a room with Katrina or give me the strength to handle the situation.  He fixed it.

I believe he fixed it because he knew I needed the encouragement that rooming with Katrina would bless me with.  We are supposed to lift up those around us and her life does just that.  Her faith is so strong.  Her commitment doesn't mean that her life is easy or without challenge, but it means that she is given the strength and ability to meet those challenges with grace instead of those difficulties just disappearing.  There are things that she is waiting for answers on, but she waits in The Lord, waits for his direction and his guidance.  Sometimes that means waiting a long time.  I was encouraged by so many of the things she said, though she may have thought they were just casual conversations.

Our other Elgin AP goer was one I didn't know quite as well.  Ruth isn't an English teacher and her kids are grown, so we just don't have as much in common, but once again, I see a woman who blesses.  She gives of her heart, of her time, of her resources so greatly.  She handles issues calmly, with grace and wisdom and kindness evident in her speech and demeanor.  I loved getting to hear about all the children that have become part of their family through the years.  Once again, these stories echoed that our Faith does not mean problems are erased, but that we will be able to deal with the problems as they arise.  He never promises ease.

I could go on and on.  So many of the women I have have become friends with encourage me on a daily basis as I see their walk evident in the way they love their husbands and children, as they deal with the outside world, as they choose life when they speak, even in the simple and not so simple kindnesses they do for each other.  I have always been blessed by the lives of the women in our church, watching their steadfastness as they serve their families and the church body.  This is doing.  This is fruit.

The past few months have shown me certain things I need to be dilligent in putting off and removing from my life, things that will distract and open doors that I don't want open if I am to be any good for my family and those around me. I have been given help in these things, but I am also quite sure that I will be tempted to pick them up again.  I also know I must do a better job teaching Bell about this life we choose.  I need to be dilligent in these matters if I am to bless you as so many in my life bless me.